Without You charts the course of Anthony Rapp's exhilarating journey with the original Broadway cast and crew of Rent as well as the intimacies of his personal life behind the curtain. Variously marked by fledgling love and devastating loss, piercing frustration and powerful enlightenment, Without You is a lovingly crafted memoir that captures the passion and grit unique to the theater world.

Without You won't be out until February 2006, but here's your chance to get a sneak peek. The first five people to comment to this entry with a valid U.S. address (don't worry, they won't be visible) will win an advance copy signed by Mr. Rapp himself!

Wow, that was fast! Thanks to everyone who replied. We've received our 5!

Without You charts the course of Anthony Rapp's exhilarating journey with the original Broadway cast and crew of Rent as well as the intimacies of his personal life behind the curtain. Variously marked by fledgling love and devastating loss, piercing frustration and powerful enlightenment, Without You is a lovingly crafted memoir that captures the passion and grit unique to the theater world.

Without You won't be out until February 2006, but here's your chance to get a sneak peek. The first five people to comment to this entry with a valid U.S. address (don't worry, they won't be visible) will win an advance copy signed by Mr. Rapp himself!

Wow, that was fast! Thanks to everyone who replied. We've received our 5!

It has been widely noted that many of the individual members of the OBC of Rent had said, when asked, that they would never go back to the show unless the entire original cast also returned. Yet in this movie, there will be a new Mimi and a new Joanne. What do you think changed peoples' minds? Was it that film is an entirely different medium? That the opportunity was too great to pass up? - Benna

I can only speak for myself, but when I said I would never go back to the show without the rest of the OBC, I was talking specifically about not going back to doing the show eight times a week on Broadway. I bear no ill will towards anyone who's performing in the show now, and I'm glad Rent is still running after all these years, but it would be very surreal to immerse myself back into it without all my other OBC friends there. Even moreso now that we've done the movie. When I was presented with the opportunity to meet with Chris about doing the film version, I was thrilled to have that chance, but never dreamed that it would turn out that I -- let alone six out of the eight original principals -- would all get to do it again. The only way I would have said no to that was if I felt the film version was going to be some sort of bastardization of what we had done before. Within two minutes of talking with Chris, I knew that I had nothing to worry about. So of course I said yes when I got the offer. That phone call of hearing about the offer was one of the greatest phone calls I've ever received.

When you get into character, how do you go about getting inside of Mark's head? - SuperScott

It's sort of second nature at this point, after all these years, but in my process I just try to let the material and the character tell me what and who they are, if that makes any sense. In the case of Mark, I embraced his mixture of isolation and desire to be a part of his friends' lives, his passion for his work, his somewhat naive self-righteousness, his difficulty processing grief, his desire to live a fulfilled life, his joy in his friends' love lives and despair over his own loneliness, his sense of humor, his commitment to leave something important behind. There's a lot there to play with, that's for sure. Then it's just a matter of being open in the moment and holding that camera or jumping on that table or tossing out that garbage can full of fire or dancing that tango. It's all a blast.

What's your favorite song in the whole show? And except for RENT, what is your favorite musical? - Lauren

I think the most powerful song in the show is the reprise of "I'll Cover You." It destroys me. I love the way the different melodies and refrains all weave together, and I think it's a perfect expression of loss and grief and love and joy all at once.

My favorite musical besides Rent is Hedwig and the Angry Inch. I love rock and roll, and I love theatre, and it's an incredible example of what's possible when you combine the best of both worlds. It's hilarious, moving, thrilling, dark, and incredibly imaginative. And amazing to perform -- I had the privilege of doing it a couple of years ago. One of the highlights of my life.

How much do you yourself relate with the character of Mark? - Stephanie

I relate quite a bit, but in many ways, over the years, I think I've grown up a lot more than Mark. This is something I address in my book, but to touch on it here, one of the most significant aspects Mark and I share is being a witness to others' illness and death. At the time I was in the show on Broadway, my mom was in her last months of a losing battle with cancer, so Mark and I were very linked in what we were experiencing. And back then I had a bit more trouble dealing with the difficulties of that situation than I think I would now. I'm not saying it would ever be easy -- far from it -- but I'm not as afraid now of the depth of emotions that great loss like the death of a loved one engender. I think where Mark is in his life at the time of Rent, he's still very reluctant to let himself experience his grief. But I relate to his desire to do important work in his life, his passion for his friends, his commitment to integrity. Stuff like that. I have tremendous respect and empathy for him.

Are you planning on coming back to the Broadway stage anytime soon? - Melissa

I certainly hope so. I've been working on a couple of developmental readings of new musicals, but it might be a while before one of them emerges on Broadway. There are few things in life I enjoy more than living in New York and going to the theatre every night to do a show. Hopefully I'll get that opportunity again sooner rather than later. Got any offers? :-P

Have you been surprised at all of the recognition and awards RENT has achieved? - Alicen

Back in the day, I was initially a bit surprised at the widespread, mainstream acceptance and celebration of Rent. After all, it's a piece that deals with themes and issues and characters that are not themselves part of the mainstream of American life. But I do believe that there's no denying the power and truth and heart at the core of Jonathan's words and music, so in another light it's not surprising at all. He was very committed to opening people's eyes and hearts and minds to the stories and lives of a community on the fringes of society, and I think he succeeded beautifully in doing just that. If you really think about it, it's rare that a musical takes on such large ideas and themes as Rent. It's not to say there's not room for shows that are just attempting to be a fun night at the theatre or a spoof of something or just tell a simpler story. But Rent has been said by many people to have changed their lives -- it has certainly changed mine in more ways than I can say -- and that's no small thing. I'm hopeful that the film will have an even greater opportunity to make an impact. It seems to me that our world, now more than ever, could use some of what is talked and sung about in Rent.

Dear Anthony, has anything like this ever happened in the history of movie marketing? A true community of fans and actors coming together to celebrate a mutual love for the work and each other? After 9+ years, the phenomenon of "Rent" continues to inspire and YOU have been a best friend to fans every step of the way! You have exceeded our expectations for staying connected "in an isolating age." Bravo Anthony! - Michael

I'm not sure if it's been done before. I think this might be a bit of a first. But it's because we all believe so strongly in what we've done with this film and want to do everything we can to communicate our enthusiasm for it. Maybe we are that much more interested in reaching out to fans because having come from doing the show in New York, we got to meet and talk to so many fans over the years. There's a tradition of reaching out that goes back a lot of years. It's a total thrill to hear from all of you. We're all beyond excited about seeing what this film does in the world once it's out there for all to witness.

You are the definitive Mark and Charlie Brown for me. Do you think there are any similarities between the two characters?- Neil

Thanks for your compliment. I think they are both somewhat on the outside looking in, but I think Charlie, for all of his sadsack nature, actually has a little bit more of a thicker skin than Mark. No matter how many times Lucy jerks that football away from him, he always gives her another chance. Foolish of him, maybe, but he never gives up entirely. I think Mark has a little more cynicism in him. But they both believe in fairness and all that. I don't think you'll ever hear Mark saying, "Good grief."

I'm going to school to hopefully one day be on Broadway, do you have any advice? Also, I hope to try out for Mark one day. Do you have any advice for that? What was the audition like? - Mike

My biggest advice is to continue to get lots and lots of training. Surround yourself with people who inspire you and call you to be bigger than you can see yourself being. Tell the truth in your work, don't worry about being perfect. Pour your heart and soul into every moment. Love what you get the privilege to do, if you get the opportunity to do it.

My initial audition was great, but I made mistakes in it and still got the part. So perfection is not the goal. :-) I write about it in a lot more detail in my book.

Does the shirt with the star on it have any significance? I've seen pictures of you wearing the red one over the years (backstage at YAGMCB) and then there's the gray one you wore for the Open House photo shoot. - Rebecca

No particular significance. It's just a shirt I like.

How much do you think the character of Mark was taken out of Jonathan's personality? - Stephanie

Quite a bit. He bore witness to his friends' deaths and attempted to create a work of art that would honor their memory. He devoted himself to his work, sometimes to the point of not connecting as deeply to his own issues. He had an unusually deep belief in justice and integrity. And from hanging out with Jonathan, there was a certain youthful glee he had in his work that I also tried to bring to aspects of Mark. But I also believe that there's a bit of Jonathan in all the characters.

Anyway, thanks everyone for your support and questions. Keep spreading the word. It's a pleasure sharing this experience with all of you.

Anthony

Hey everybody --

Thanks for the hundreds of comments you all have been posting in response to our blog entries. Seems like Idina is far and away the winner in the comments sweepstakes, huh? Glad to see her many fans from Wicked are following her to this project as well. Seriously, your support and enthusiasm has meant so much to all of us. Keep spreading the word...

Anyway, I wanted to respond to some of the questions that have piled up. So here goes.

What's it like working with everyone again? Was it hard to get back into the character? - Lindsey

Working with everyone again -- and playing this character again -- has been like going home. I know it might sound sappy or something, but it's true. Even though we last performed this show together almost eight years ago, somehow the connection we all had to the material has stayed alive and fresh, and in some ways has even deepened. I have always felt a real affinity to Mark, and I still do, so it was nothing but a pleasure to step into his shoes again. I have always loved that in Mark I get to play someone who's alternately intense, funny, intelligent, a little wacky, pent up, grief-stricken, frustrating, and very much alive. It's the best role I've ever had the privilege to play.

With your busy schedule are you able to spend much time at home? - Lwazi

Lately, I've been gone far more often than I've been home. I was on the road with Little Shop of Horrors from last August until December, at which point I stayed in San Francisco to work on Rent, which just ended a couple of weeks ago. In the meantime I had a couple of weeks in New York while we shot the first few scenes, but that's it. I'm not complaining at all, though; I love to work, and I love to travel. It'd be pretty ideal, though, to get a job that keeps me home for awhile, since I also love to be home. We'll see what comes along next.

Do you ever think that you know your character so well that you don't need direction anymore? - Thomas

Honestly, no. I am always aware that because I can't really be objective about my performance, I will need someone there to point things out to me. I do believe that there are times when I might have a stronger insight about what a particular moment should feel like, since I'm the one living it, but in cases like that I hope the director and I have the kind of relationship where we can discuss and collaborate on such things. Happily, Chris and I had that, both in Adventures in Babysitting and in Rent. He's incredibly trusting of his actors, but also knows what he wants, and is able to communicate well so both of us are happy. That's a rare quality, especially when it comes to directors of films, who are sometimes less than articulate when talking to actors. Theatre directors tend to be a bit more actor-friendly.

Can we hope for a photography book, Anthony? - Bethy

Well, that's not entirely up to me; it would be up to a publisher who thinks highly enough of my photography to put it out into the world. I would love to have the opportunity to collect some of my work, although I'm not sure it's good enough to merit a whole book. There's more to this response, though, which will come later in the entry...

What's it like working with Columbus again, it's been almost 20 years since "Adventures in Babysitting?" Is there a "short hand" between you, since you've worked together already? - Rod

I think I already answered this a little bit, but I will elaborate by saying that he hasn't really changed at all, except that he's more confident now, in the wake of all of his enormous success. He's just as open, kind, and as much of a smartass as he's always been. I also discovered that he's a brilliant cartoonist, and he's had four kids since 1987, so now he's a dedicated father. I just hope that 18 more years don't go by before we work together again. I told him as much, too. I'm all for Jesse's idea of a rep company. I'd be there in a millisecond.

Do you think this production will convey the same spirit as the stage production? - Joel

In many, many ways, yes. I have no doubt about that. In some ways, the film will tell the story a little more clearly; no one would argue that Jonathan left a couple of things a little unclear, and Chris has taken the opportunity to strengthen those plot points in a way that should really help. Having said that, I hope the film has the same kind of emotional, visceral impact that the stage version has had for so many people over the years. It feels like it will, but I haven't seen it yet, so I can only go on my instincts.

Is it sad to realize you'll probably not be doing those scenes, especially the ones you're attached to, ever again? - Christyn

In a way, yes, but there will be a ten-year anniversary event of some sort in 2006 (yes, you heard it here first -- keep your eyes and ears peeled) so I'll get to do some of it again, plus whatever TV and/or live appearances we do in support of the film's release. And the luxury of the medium of film is that it's forever, so those scenes are captured for all time, which is a huge gift.

There's something about your writing - or your words in general, is more like it - that is so eloquent. I wonder: have you ever thought of penning a book of some sort? - Caitlin

First of all, thanks for the compliment. Secondly, yes, I have thought of penning a book. In fact, I've done more than think about it; I've gone and done it. My book is a memoir of the two most important events of my life -- being part of the original cast of Rent and losing my mother to cancer while I was in the show. It's scheduled to be published by Simon & Schuster in January, and will be called Without You. Writing it was the most challenging thing I have ever done. I have a brother, Adam Rapp, who's an accomplished author, so I'm very proud to join him on bookstore shelves. And going back to the question about my photography, I will be including some of my photos in the book.

How are newcomers Rosario and Tracie doing? Do they feel some extra stress? - Mr. K

I think they felt some extra pressure at first, but we all did our best to make them feel comfortable, and if they still felt nervous in any way, you would *never* know from the quality of their work. They couldn't have been more dedicated, full of heart, or fierce in the film. And on a selfish note, I'm so happy that I have two great new friends in my life.

How did you feel when they said that they wanted t make a movie out of RENT? Had you been keeping in touch with everyone before the movie? - Rachel

I'd kept in touch with some of the cast very closely, and others I've checked in with over the years. We've always known how one another is doing, as there's been a sort of phone or email tree. As for how I felt about the movie, there had been so many rumors over the years, but when I heard that Chris was doing it, I was hoping that my past relationship with him might prove to be helpful to me. :-) Happily, it was, and he gave me the greatest opportunity in my life: immortalizing this character on screen, and being a part of telling the best story I've had the privilege to tell.

Toughest scene to film? Most surprising moment? - Marlen

Believe it or not, no scene was "tough," because I was just so happy to be on the set. But five days of "La Vie Boheme" was physically and vocally challenging, although I could have done it for another five days, or longer. I don't think I've ever cried as much as I did during the three days we worked on "Finale B" and "Your Eyes," which was emotionally draining, but again, the work was so fulfilling that I wouldn't classify it as "tough." I'm not sure I would call anything surprising, per se, but often moments exceeded my already-high expectations. I don't really want to say much more about that, though, since I want to leave some things as surprises for you all.

Are you recording the songs again, or will you be singing to the album already recorded? - Meg

I think this was already sort of answered, but to clarify, we have recorded entirely new versions of the songs. You will be pleased with the results, I promise.

Is there going to be a soundtrack for the movie? - Lacey

Yep, and it will be out in advance of the film, although I'm not sure of the date of release. I'm sure the folks who manage the blog will let you know.

That's it for the current batch of questions. Keep them coming, and thanks again for all of your interest and support.

Anthony

Hey everybody --

Thanks, as always, for the outpouring of support.

As we're continuing the filming process, I keep thinking about the word "forever." Nine years ago, when we opened on Broadway, everything was so thrilling and exhausting and heady and powerful, but there was always the pervasive sense that because we were doing theatre, the day would come when our time with the show would be over. That's the nature of theatre, of course, and in some ways, it's what makes theatre special: you had to be there, in that moment, to see that specific performance. And even though I did the show hundreds and hundreds of times, there are certainly nights that stand out in my memory: our opening nights downtown and uptown, the night the Clinton family came to the show, the nights of cast members' final shows, to name a few. But with film, the performance that we give on the day of shooting a particular scene will last forever. In some ways, that can be an intimidating thought, but in this case, I've found it to be very inspiring.

Yesterday we shot "La Vie Boheme A" all day long, and even though it's a very vigorous and intense number, the fact that what we were doing was going to be captured for all time continuously gave me energy, and I believe gave everyone energy, so that the day flew by, and at the end of the day, I could have kept going. A couple of weeks ago, when we shot "I'll Cover You (Reprise)," I marveled at how incredibly consistent and powerful Jesse was all day long, singing his heart out again and again and again, from the first shot of the day to the last, and never giving less than 100%. Last week, Adam did the same while we filmed "Finale A" and "Your Eyes" for three days straight. I think we've all discovered that when it comes to singing these songs and filling these characters with life, we have reserves of energy and commitment that I don't think we would have known were there if we hadn't been challenged in this way.

In some ways, I suppose it all fits in with the spirit of Jonathan's writing: when we're shooting a scene, there is truly no day but today (or three days, depending on how much coverage of the scene we need to capture), and I think we all recognize that, and bring our all to it. And Jonathan's words and music continue to reward us with their power and insight and joy and heartbreak, all these years later.

Oh, and I have to admit that it's also a hell of a lot of fun to dance on a table, which certainly helps as well. You should try it sometime if you don't believe me.

More soon...

We started filming in New York, in freezing weather, getting what we could of exterior shots in the city. Unfortunately, New York City now has a noise law that you can't shoot after 10:00 p.m. on the streets and play loud music for playback, so that prevented us from getting to do more stuff in the city. But Chris and our production designer Howard and our cinematographer Stephen have all dedicated themselves to defying anyone to recognize that the entire film wasn't shot in NYC. We shall see, but from everything I've seen so far, I think they've done a great job. At any rate, the bottom line is that the East Village has changed so much from when Rent takes place that even when we did shoot there, Howard had to make adjustments to the buildings to make them look authentic to the time of the film.

So far we've shot the entirety of only a few songs: the Angel and Collins version of "I'll Cover You," Light My Candle," "Life Support," "One Song Glory," "Today 4 U," "Seasons of Love," and the Mark and Roger fight in "Goodbye Love." Other songs have at least chucks of them done: "Without You," "Out Tonight," "Will I...?" "Rent," "Another Day," "Tango: Maureen," "Santa Fe," and "What You Own." ("La Vie Boheme," "You'll See Boys," "I'll Cover You: Reprise," "Over the Moon," "Halloween," "Take Me or Leave Me," "I Should Tell You," "Your Eyes," "Finale A," and "Finale B" have yet to have any footage of them shot.) That's the nature of filmmaking: when you have more than one location for any given song, such as "What You Own," you can keep picking away at finishing the necessary shots all throughout the filming schedule; but when you have a song that takes place entirely in the loft, for instance, like "Light My Candle," you only need a couple of days to finish it. I have not yet seen anything all cut together, I've only watched some of the filming of other people's scenes, and a little bit of the playback on days when I've been filming, but I am not exaggerating when I say that I think this will be one of the most beautifully shot films I'll ever see. I can't wait to watch the whole thing in its edited form. But seriously, I do believe that Stephen Goldblatt, our director of photography, is a genius. What he is able to do with shadows, with the richness of the grain in the film, with his use of color, and with his shot selections (all of which is a collaboration with the designers and Chris, of course), is truly breathtaking. As an amateur still photographer myself, I'm especially impressed with his use of available light, and his use of lighting instruments that make it seem like he's only using available light. I hope he gets recognition for his efforts. He's been nominated for two Oscars before, for Batman Forever and Prince of Tides, so maybe this film will give him a third shot at winning the big prize.

There is so much more to say, and I will continue to say it as often as I can, but now I have to get ready for the day's work. Today we'll be finishing up the first section of the Tango, and then moving on to a couple of other little scenes that happen outside Maureen's performance space. Tomorrow we get going on "Over the Moon" and the riot, which should be very fun, and a little nutty.

Thanks for reading, and for all of your support and belief in this project.

Greetings, everybody. My first "official" blog entry. Back in 1996 and 1997, when Rent first started, I used to spend a lot of time interacting with folks on the Internet, and when the film came together for me, I dipped my toe back in the water. It's always meant a great deal to me that Rent speaks to so many people so deeply, and I've never wanted to feel removed from the show's audience, especially its biggest fans, and the Internet has been a great way to get a feel for the kind of impact that Jonathan Larson's work has made.

So we've been working on the film now for a few months. We started rehearsals back in November here in San Francisco, out on Treasure Island, which has an incredible view of the city back across the water. Rehearsals mostly consisted of building the dance numbers, or more specifically trying to figure out the best amount and kind of dance that should be in the film. It turned out that at least for me, the most elaborate dance number is for Tango: Maureen, appropriately enough, so most of my rehearsals were for that. In the film, our tango will be much more complicated and drawn from authentic tango moves than the one from the show, which has been a lot of fun for Tracie Thoms, who plays Joanne, and myself. There will also be a nice surprise element to the number, which I won't reveal here, cause hey, that will ruin the surprise, won't it?

We also spent a fair amount of time in rehearsals going over the music with Tim Weil, who was our original musical director as well. It was great to have him around for this process, since we've all had an amazing connection with him for the first day of Off-Broadway rehearsals over nine years ago. (Nine years! It's still kind of hard to believe!) And in January we spent a few weeks recording the music, because when we film each song, we are lip-synching to a prerecorded track. Although calling it lip-synching is a bit of a misnomer, since we're still actually singing while the cameras are rolling; it's important for our bodies and throats and faces to have evidence of the effort involved in singing, or we'd look like empty puppets or something. Anyway, we are all so thrilled with the results of the recording sessions, which were produced by Green Day's producer, Rob Cavallo. The film's soundtrack will be much more authentically rock and roll in the rock songs, be more lush and beautiful in the ballads, and overall will have a much richer sonic landscape than the previous recording we did. I really think Jonathan would be especially thrilled with the results.